Okay, what is it with you gay people, anyway? Take what you have managed to do to children’s cartoons: if recruiting Bert and Ernie wasn’t bad enough, you then sent Twinkie Winkie into the nation’s kindergartens with your none-too-subtle message about the desirability of the homosexual lifestyle. Now–crafty perverts that you are–you?ve made Sponge-Bob Square-Pants a soldier in the army of evil, and sent him off to do battle in the Great American Culture War. Have you no shame?
Okay, what is it with you gay people, anyway?
Take what you have managed to do to children’s cartoons: if recruiting Bert and Ernie wasn’t bad enough, you then sent Twinkie Winkie into the nation’s kindergartens with your none-too-subtle message about the desirability of the homosexual lifestyle. Now—crafty perverts that you are—you’ve made Sponge-Bob Square-Pants a soldier in the army of evil, and sent him off to do battle in the Great American Culture War. Have you no shame?
Awful as these dastardly, un-Christian deeds are, I must admit I am impressed—it takes real skill to pull off a conspiracy of this magnitude. The professionalism of the network dedicated to advancing the gay agenda is truly awe-inspiring! And you even have the Boy Scouts on the ropes again. According to a letter shared with me by the former Eagle Scout who received it, Americans are faced with a dire moral and patriotic dilemma; we must all decide whether we stand “with the Boy Scouts of America or with the anti-Constitution ACLU.” The letter—sent by a group that styles itself the “American Civil Rights Union”—says that an immediate response (i.e., money) is “needed right now because leftist radicals are attempting to force the Boy Scouts to trash their moral code…to abandon their religious values…and to accept homosexuals as scout leaders!”
The letter goes on to say that the ACLU, radical feminists, and gay rights organizations (they put quotation marks around “rights”) are trying to force the Boy Scouts to change their policies and “embrace homosexuals” even though the Supreme Court has ruled that “as a private organization” the Scouts have the right to choose their own leaders.
Well—not exactly. The Supreme Court did, indeed, rule 5-4 in a New Jersey case that the First Amendment right of association protected the right of the Boy Scouts to discriminate against gays. But the issue wasn’t that the organization was private; the New Jersey Supreme Court had expressly ruled that they were not a private organization, and the Scouts didn’t appeal that part of the decision. Instead, they argued that—even though they were public—they had a First Amendment right to exclude people whose membership would threaten the very identity of the organization. If girls had wanted to join, for example, the First Amendment would protect them, on the very reasonable basis that being a boy is essential to the identity of a “boy” scout. If the Catholic Youth Organization wants to exclude Jews, if the Sons of Ireland bars members whose ancestry is French, they can do so, private or not, because being Catholic or Irish is what the organization is all about. The Boy Scouts argued—successfully—that being straight is what Boy Scouts are all about. After all, the Boy Scout oath clearly requires that members be “morally straight.” What else could that mean? (As Dave Barry might say, I am not making this up. The ruling was asinine, but that’s what you get when homophobes like Scalia use their position to defend the “decent” Americans to whom this letter was sent.)
As a friend of mine says, you couldn’t make this stuff up.
The question, of course, is what is wrong with these people? What are they so terrified of? What is it about the very existence of gays and lesbians that is so threatening? How can they believe that the extension of equal rights under the law to all citizens would usher in the End of Western Civilization and Life as We Have Known It? It is easy—and tempting—to react to these attacks with a pitying laugh and then ignore them. But that would be a mistake, because increasingly, these are the people who are wielding the power of the state.
These are the people who provided the crucial margin to elect Bush. They provide support for his war in Iraq and the profiling of Muslims here at home, because they believe America is a Christian nation waging holy war with Islam. They are the ones re-writing science texts in Pennsylvania and elsewhere, to include “intelligent design” (a/k/a creationism). Thanks to their efforts, sex education curricula now teach teenagers that abstinence is normal as well as moral, that truly safe sex is impossible, that abortions increase the incidence of breast cancer and that HIV can be transmitted through tears and sweat. They are the people who may well elect Roy Moore Governor of Georgia, and who did elect several Senators and Representatives who want to criminalize women who abort.
So here’s my plea: would all of you who have been so successful in advancing the gay agenda please stop sweating the small stuff? If you can recruit Sponge-Bob and Twinky Winky, if you can manage to destroy the Boy Scouts, surely you can use your awesome power to do something about the Bush Administration!